I've been thinking about the gap between the massive, complex conflicts we see in the headlines and the work that many of us try to do every day. It's easy to feel a bit disconnected from it all.
I often come back to Viktor Frankl's observation in Man's Search for Meaning about the space between stimulus and response. He notes that in that space lies our freedom to choose our response. For anyone in mediation or leadership, that little gap is where we live and work.
But what does it actually mean to use that space well? This is where I find Robert Bordone's work on Conflict Resilience so practical. He describes it as the capacity to stay engaged in a disagreement, even when it's uncomfortable—to listen with generosity and hold the discomfort without avoiding or simply fighting. It's not about winning, but about staying in the conversation.
This is the micro-work of peace. It's the decision to take a breath before replying to a difficult email. It's choosing to ask a clarifying question instead of making an assumption. It's the quiet effort to find a third option when a team is stuck. None of these moments feel world-changing on their own, but they are how we build the muscle for navigating friction. They are the practice of resilience.
Minister Shanmugam made a similar point last week — that it’s the “quiet and sustained contributions” of community leaders reaching across divides that create the conditions for harmony. The same principle applies in our workplaces and boardrooms.
These small, intentional choices are, I think, the most tangible way we have to counter the bigger patterns of division. They are a quiet but firm way of holding our ground, even in days when we feel like we’re standing on shifting sands.
So, here's to staying the course in that small, crucial space. It's not glamorous, but it's honest work, and it matters.
Linda Heng
Mediator, Trainer & Conflict Specialist